Totally disillusioned by my career
Hi Em and Michael, I'm at a loss to know what to do with my career. I've been a nurse for almost a decade. It had its issues beforehand but it is a total disaster zone post covid. I've thought about further study but am overwhelmed by both the financial commitment and attempting to study with small kids at home. I wouldn't call opportunities regionally abundant... and I just don't it any more. As an industry it's not real healthy. What to do?
Small peen
I have recently started seeing someone new, I am really enjoying my time with this guy and really want to see where it goes longer term. However, he is not blessed with his penis size, I don’t know what classifies micro, I wouldn’t quite give it that status but it wouldn’t be too much bigger. I don’t think someone should be judged on their size because that’s not all a person has to offer and they can’t help it can they! But I am struggling to pleasure him and the sex has been unsurprisingly not super pleasurable at my end either. I know I probably just need to approach this with open honesty and discuss what works best for him and myself etc. but I am wondering if perhaps you have any small peen experience and have some hot tips for me first? Thanks in advance - please keep me under and alias
I don’t feel safe at work
I’m very lucky to have a secure job in the arts in my regional town, and the team I work with is the best team I’ve ever been a part of. However, I do not feel safe to be, for lack of a better phrase, openly autistic/ADHD at work. I was diagnosed Autistic and ADHD a year ago and come home every day exhausted from masking at work. I want to start unmasking in the workplace but don’t feel safe enough to. I have overheard conversations about how people they know who are neurodiverse are ‘difficult’ which makes me anxious about unmasking at work because of the pre-existing thoughts. Moving jobs isn’t really an option because of my location, and a flexible WFH arrangement has already been turned down. Do you have any advice on what I can do to feel safer in my workplace?
Co-worker - "I don't believe in labels"
From Anon. There is someone at work in a senior position that gets under my skin when they, on a monthly basis, say "I don't believe in labels". I want to be able to shut down this conversation. I am on the bandwagon of straight 40 year old woman recently diagnosed ADHD (thanks Em!). I had no clue anything was up my entire life so never suspected ADHD. It surprises everyone I have it. I don't care to convince people I have it either as I don't want to put my energy into this. This person enjoys initiating and having controversial conversations. They have outwardly expressed on multiple occasions that they don't see the point in people having labels to describe their neurodivergence, gender and sexuality. They have made statements such as "I don't have a problem with gay people, my friends that I had dinner with last night are gay". They make uneducated statements such as "we're all on the spectrum". Whilst they are generally well read on a wide range of topics they have not scratched the surface on exploring neurodivergence. Whilst this is dreadful, the consensus is that they aren't meaning to inflict harm and they don't have the awareness that their statements are hurtful. This person has been very supportive in other ways and they genuinely aren't a malicious character. I've responded in different ways from ignoring and not becoming part of the conversation to responding. I have told them that I believe labels, as this person puts it, are hugely important to people that are seeking help to move forward positively as this can unlock tools to get you and others to a better space. This shut the conversation down quite successfully one time. But then they brought the same topic up again weeks later. I didn't care to repeat myself. There's something about this person that it gets under my skin that they don't take ADHD seriously. I've not directed told them I'm diagnosed but I'm fairly sure they have been told through the grapevine that I am diagnosed and am medicated. I have been incredibly open with my diagnosis journey with my supportive colleagues, one of which is self diagnosed ADHD since childhood. I have not formally reported my diagnosis to work. Also, the most ridiculous thing is that the perpetrator has, without doubt, ADHD. Funny how ADHDers attract in the workplace. Undiagnosed, it shows up in every part of their life in every single minute. They used to joke often about themself being autistic (in another instance of poor taste) until I very directly told them no, you have ADHD. It was around this time the conversation pivoted to "I hate labels". I do wonder if they bring the "I hate labels" conversation up to try and get me to tell them my diagnosis directly. This doesn't feel like a safe space to bring it up in though. They say controversial things often to get attention (dopamine hit?). Often I turn a blind eye to these conversations, whether I engage or not, but I really feel strongly about needing to take action in some way to shut this one down once and for all. In an ideal world they'd go away and deep dive learn about ADHD as they have with other medical conditions in the past - they subscribe and recite journals from Nature (a library of medical journals) often. Then perhaps they'd have some empathy, which currently is non existent. In an ideal world they also get diagnosed and medicated because this would also make the work environment less chaotic. Advise from Em and Michael would be gratefully received. Love the pod and all your opinions! Anon x